Only Daughter by Sandra Cisneros: BA/BASW / BBS Note:

 

 “Only Daughter” by Sandra Cisneros

In “Only Daughter”, Sandra Cisneros describes the difficulties of growing up as the only daughter in a Mexican- American family of six sons and challenges society’s views on a traditional Mexican family. The general stereotypes depict a son being of value as they’re allowed to work and provide for the family whereas women are expected to clean and cook always. Cisneros was the only daughter in a Mexican family full of boys. She often wouldn’t play with her brothers as they were too embarrassed to be seen playing with a girl. This position of being alone and the only daughter left Cisneros to be by herself to think and embrace writing. This field was not seen as credible to her father and he expected her to become an English teacher if he ever wanted to deem his daughter as successful but Cisneros proved her father wrong proving to both him and society the roles women play in the world. The conflict is resolved when her father asks if he could get more copies for the family.

This story is important because of the message behind the piece. It brings to light an important issue in our society regarding stereotypes and the author looks down upon these judgments and expectation. She shows the reader that even when you’re looked down upon in society, whether it’s because you’re a minority or behave differently, your true values will shine through in the end and people will appreciate and respect you for who you are.

To conclude, I’d recommend this piece to anyone. Society should read this piece so they may learn what Cisneros has to say about society. Throughout the piece she talks about the struggle of being an “only daughter” and the mixed feelings of being a minority. She emphasizes her confusion over what she should become because of the pressures from her father/society. She speaks in first person to allow the reader to become her and to be placed in her shoes allowing a more personal experience, meaning the theme behind the story is most likely very close to her. This piece is filled with examples of her trying to fight through the stereotypes and to become something of her and it’s clear that she wants the world to know her story, and I’m on board with her.

Textual Analysis of Only Daughter by Sandra Cisneros

As children, we all want our parents to feel proud of us and accept us for who we are.  It’s a basic human instinct to want to feel love and acceptance from those who we admire the most. The essay, “Only Daughter,” by Sandra Cisneros, demonstrates how a parent’s lack of acceptance and encouragement can shape a person’s life.  Cisneros uses literary terms such as pathos, word choice, and irony to demonstrate how her challenging and isolated upbringing affected her in many ways.        

Sandra Cisneros grew up as one of seven children in an ethnic Mexican family. She was the only daughter surround by six brothers who looked down upon her for being the only girl in the family. They isolated her because they were ashamed to play with a girl in public. Cisneros had to fight to be noticed in her household.  From an early age, she understood the meaning of loneliness.  Cisneros emphasizes throughout the story how isolated her family made her feel. Her father would go around telling people, “I have seven sons”.  Even though this was not meant to hurt her, these words still impacted her.  Cisneros says, “he didn’t mean anything by that mistranslation, I’m sure. But somehow, I could feel myself being erased”. To understand what Cisneros means here, the reader has to understand what she means when she says that it was a “mistranslation.” In the Spanish language, the term, hijos, can mean “children” or “sons.”  When Cisneros’ father said, “siete hijos”, he obviously meant seven children, but Cisneros was sensitive to feeling left out and got offended by the mistranslation. Although this saddened her, Cisneros used her loneliness to her advantage. Cisneros uses her isolation as a time to thrive as a writer and creative thinker.         

Cisneros also emphasizes the impact her Mexican culture had on her. Cisneros grew up in different houses alternating between America and Mexico.  Her father constantly told Cisneros how he wanted her to grow up according to the Mexican culture.  The Mexican culture did not support women working. In Cisneros’ culture, a women’s place was in the home. According to her father, her purpose in life was to become someone’s wife. Cisneros’s father shook his head in disappointment when he realized that his daughter went to college to get an education and a job instead of going to college in search of a husband. Cisneros writes, “After four years in college and two more in graduate school, and still no husband, my father shakes his head even now and says I wasted all that education”. Despite her father’s limited view of women’s social roles, Cisneros knows that her college education did not go to a waste.         

            Cisneros demonstrates her frequent emotions of isolation and desperation to feel good enough in her father’s eyes using the literary device, pathos.  Throughout the essay, the reader often feels sympathetic towards Cisneros’ situation. Even though she had so much potential to be a brilliant writer, her father, brothers, and culture clearly tried to stifle her. When Cisneros mentioned going to college in order to become a writer, her brothers laughed and mocked her efforts. Her father only wanted his daughter to go to college to find a good husband. In one part of the essay, Cisneros illustrates how much her father’s opinion truly impacted her. She writes, “In a sense, everything I have ever written has been for him, to win his approval”.  This makes the reader feel sad for Cisneros.  The reader sympathizes with Cisneros and her countless efforts to make her father proud.  All her efforts to become a successful writer were to make her father proud and we can see that she never really gets that satisfaction. We can see the desperation in her words as she begs for her father’s approval. 

            Even towards the end of the essay, when Cisneros’ father finally starts to show a glimmer of acceptance of his daughter, we can see her hanging on to his every word.   Cisneros goes home for Christmas and brings with her a copy of a story published in an anthology of Chicano writing.  She watches him read her story and anxiously awaits a reply.  We can see that Cisneros was worried about what her father would think, not knowing if he would respond positively or negatively to her writing. She says, “When he was finally finished, after what seemed like hours”. This shows how anxious she must have been. The few minutes she waited for him to finish reading her story, seemed like hours because she was so worried about his opinion of her story and his validation of her abilities as a writer.  The reader can also see that Cisneros’ father’s pride in his daughter is not unconditional.  Cisneros writes, “I’m not sure if it was because my story was translated into Spanish, or because it was published in Mexico, or perhaps because the story dealt with Topeyac, the colonia my father was raised in and the house he grew up in, but at any rate, my father punched the mute button on his remote control and read my story”.  Even if Cisneros didn’t want to admit it, a part of her knew that if her story wasn’t in Spanish and wasn’t relatable to her father, he might not have read the story.  Despite this knowledge, Cisneros was proud to be recognized by her father even in the smallest of ways.          

            In addition to pathos, Cisneros also uses her original word choice to emphasize how her father degraded her and didn’t accept her aspirations in life. Throughout the essay, Cisneros inserts several Spanish words into her essay to emphasize certain points in her story.  For instance, when talking about being a teacher, Cisneros uses the words, maestra and profesora. She says, “I wanted my father to understand what it was I was scribbling, to introduce me as ‘My only daughter, the writer.’ Not as ‘This is only my daughter. She teaches.’ Es maestro teacher. Not even profesora”. Although both words mean “teacher” in Spanish, the term profesora has more recognition as a more educated, respected teacher. The term profesora, is more often used to describe a college or higher education teacher as opposed to maestra, which teaches lower levels of schooling.  By referring to Cisneros as a maestra, instead of profesora was degrading to her and her accomplishments.  Cisneros’ Spanish word choice helps the reader better understand why she’s so upset by her father’s words.      

            Cisneros’ use of both Spanish and English words could have also been chosen to appeal to her Mexican audience.  At one point during the essay, Cisneros tries to explain that her purpose for writing was for her father and people similar to her father. Cisneros says, “My father represents, then, the public majority. A public who is disinterested in reading, and yet one whom I am writing about and for, and privately trying to woo”.  Cisneros is trying to educate her culture, while also trying to prove them wrong.  Cisneros talks about how her father isn’t educated.  He cannot read English words and spent all of his life working with his hands instead of his head.  She wants to make her father, and people like her father, understand that education is essential for everyone.  While trying to educate her culture, she is also trying to prove them wrong.  Part of what was holding her back, was the low expectations the Mexican culture had for women.  Everyone thought that college was for men.  College was trivial for women unless they were looking for a husband.  By writing this essay and many of her other stories, Cisneros proves her culture wrong. She proves that women can be successful too. Her culture should celebrate this fact, not discourage it.       

            Cisneros also uses irony to depict the complicated relationship she had with her father, which affected her upbringing.  It is ironic that throughout the essay, Cisneros goes to such great lengths to set herself apart from the one man she truly craves approval from. Cisneros tries to be different from her father in many different ways.  For example, while her father never learned English and spent his days working hard manual labor, Cisneros was the opposite.  She learned English and wrote stories in both English and Spanish. She wanted to go to college and be educated.  She wanted to break away from her cultural norms, instead of being like her father, who “suffered bouts of nostalgia”.  It was also ironic that Cisneros’ father insisted that his children go through life using their heads, not their hands when he insisted that college was not the place for his daughter.  He shook his head when she wanted to go to school to get an education but insisted that his daughter should use her head.  Cisneros writes, “’Use this,’ my father said, tapping his head, ‘and not this,’ showing us those hands”.  Lastly, it is ironic that despite everyone pushing Cisneros to find a husband, she never writes anything about a man in her life.  Her father, the man who seems most disappointed that his daughter can’t find a partner, seems to be the only main male in Cisneros’ life.  Her lack of acceptance and approval may have had long lasting damaging effects on Cisneros.          

            Cisneros clearly explains the importance that a parent’s love and acceptance has on a young child.  These lack of emotions can effect a person, not only short-term, but also long-term.  Although Cisneros used her isolation and lack of acceptance to her benefit to write many award winning stories, not everyone deals with these emotions in the same way.  Cisneros shows her audience how to deal with issues similar to hers in a healthy, constructive way.  Cisneros’ use of the rhetorical strategies of pathos, word choice and irony helped construct an effective persuasive argument.  She effectively got her point across using these three rhetorical strategies.  These strategies were successful for Cisneros’ intended audience and effectively conveyed her main purpose of the essay.

Note by: Keshab Bdr. Pun & Surya Sharma